fourstrings | lies on the lips of a priest

lies on the lips of a priest

[ When you live the kind of life Wolfwood does, you have to have rules in place. Like: some things you remember, and some things you forget, because if you don’t do the second thing there’s no way you’ll survive the first. Or: children are pure, and adults, in general, are shit. Or: People can call him Wolfwood (for preference), Punisher (if it’s work), or Nick (at a stretch), but nobody gets to call him Nico anymore. Or: it’s better to fuck without kissing if you can get away with it, because kissing – faces close so close you share breath, the thing that everyone needs to keep living – is how you catch feelings.

Vash has an irritating way of blasting right through all his rules.

Rule one, they’ve done okay with. He can’t remember what it was that tipped him off that the restless, fidgeting way Vash tossed and turned when they shared a bed meant he wanted to cuddle. And that’s good, because it’s probably some tearjerking, traumatic bullshit that causes Vash to be so fucking anxious when someone’s that close that he can’t be at ease unless they wrap him up close and kind. He did, though; figured it out, caught Vash up in his arms and felt the other man go pliable and sweet in his embrace, and he finally managed some fucking sleep. After that is where is all turned to shit. They next time they’d done it Vash had just been watching him with those big, clear eyes, his permanent blush starker even in the dark, and maybe it was some stupid plant power at play but Wolfwood lost his mind and kissed him. It had been good, warm and wet and heated, and Vash had said please, Nico, can I- with his hand already halfway in Wolfwood’s pants and of course he’d said yes. But when it came time to repay the favour Vash had brightly said oh, that’s okay, I’m actually really tired! and immediately done the worst job of pretending to fall asleep Wolfwood’s ever seen in his life, complete with little snoring sounds that were a hair’s breadth from the honk-shooo mimimimimi bullshit you see in old cartoons.

The next time they’d done it Vash had kissed him first, and he’d been really into it until he shoved one of his thighs between those stupidly long, slender legs with the idea of grinding it against Vash until he had no option but to let Wolfwood give him a blowjob or at least a handy, and realized Vash wasn’t hard. That had felt shitty, but he still let Vash get him off, and that’s how he knows he fucked up when he broke his rule: he kissed, and then he had to lay there feeling like worm shit after he finished and Vash answered his groping hand with thanks, but that was enough for me! and faked falling asleep again.

This time, when Vash thrashes around and Wolfwood pulls him in close, he jerks his head back when Vash leans in for a kiss. He wants it – of course he does – but his stomach’s sour as a hangover when he thinks about going through that whole performance again. Rocking his hardon against a pelvis so flat Vash might as well be one of those dumb boy dolls they make so the dolls with long blonde hair and ballistic plastic tits have someone for little girls to marry them to, coming in a way that makes him want to watch Vash’s face and tell him things he doesn’t tell anyone, laying there hating himself for it when Vash makes fake little mnm mnm sleep sounds.

He squints against the dark. A wasted effort, when the colour of Vash’s big eyes almost seems to glow, but he does it anyway. ]

You know you don’t have to do all that shit. I’ll still hold you.

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[ vash blinks, eyes going wide and blush flaring up along his cheekbones. there's a solid few minutes where he's speechless, knocked so far off-balance that all he can do is stare, but. ]

Niiiiico...! [ yeah, he's tearing up. ]

Ugh.

[ He knows it's just Vash, he knows they're happy tears. He's seen him cry over a baby bird! It's not a big deal! None of that reasoning helps, and seeing Vash with his eyes welling up puts a heavy ache in his chest that makes him panic to fix it with no regard for the fact that nothing's actually all that wrong. ]

C'mon, don't do that. You're killing me. You're gonna train me like a dog, make me too scared to say anything nice to you.

No, no, no!

[ he can't help it! but now he's gonna smush a series of (slightly salty) kisses all over wolfwood's face, like that'll help make up for it. ] Be nice to me more! I like it!

[ So Vash is alleviating his training concerns by taking a turn at being the puppy, huh? Wolfwood's still got hands on his face, so he uses them to hold Vash in place and slow that flurry of kisses long enough to plant a soft, lingering one right on his mouth. That's nice, right? ]

[ oh. that is nice. and it works like magic, too! because the second wolfwood's mouth is on his, vash practically melts -- forgoing the excited wriggling to go loose and pliable above him, sighing out an endlessly pleased sound against the other man's mouth.

it's... easy to forget to ask himself if all of this is something he deserves, something that's fair for him to even have. scary easy, actually. ]

[ Mmm. That's good. Vash so often seems like a bundle of nerves, it's pretty good to have a weapon in his arsenal to calm him down. He lingers, licking gently into Vash's mouth, not even minding that he can taste himself there despite his dire warnings from before.

Oh! Which reminds him! ]

Hey. I noticed you were, uh... having a little issue there while you were sucking me off. Bit of tension you needed to release, huh?

Want some help with it?

[ wolfwood licks into his mouth, and vash moans, hooking the fingers of his prosthetic over one of the other man's shoulders like he needs to keep him there. kissing wolfwood... is good! his mouth is warm and wet, and tastes like tobacco and just a little bit like vash, and vash would have never called that a winning combination before, but...

then wolfwood breaks away, and vash whines. pitifully! like a man who's had their hands slapped away from a cool glass of water after a day of wandering in the desert.

but.

oh.

oh!! promptly going pink all over again. ] A-Ah, no, it's nothing!

[ Old habits die hard, huh?

Luckily they've gotten far enough that Wolfwood doesn't take it too rough. ]

Alright. Guess I'll get some shuteye, then.

[ Delivered too calmly to be anything but a trap. A trap which reveals itself when Wolfwood fakes a yawn, rolls them onto their sides, closes his eyes... and slots his thigh right between Vash's legs again, shifting it in a way he could try to argue was just a result of getting cmfortable for sleep. ]

Wha -- Hey!

[ that's no fair! vash figured at least they could kiss a little more, right? that's obviously not selfish, because wolfwood is getting something out of it, too!

but then wolfwood rolls and drags vash with him, and promptly announces that he's going to sleep! which is... hey, wait a minute, suspiciously close to the trick vash used to pull on him! he sees what's going on he --

which is right when wolfwood presses a thigh up between his legs, and vash ruts up against it with a little groan before he can help himself. ] Unfair.

[ His eyes are still closed, but he's smirking. ]

Can't hear you. I'm asleep.

[ He is clearly not asleep, but whether the talking or the fact that he's now rocking his thigh in a slow, firm rhythm is the bigger giveaway is up to Vash. ]

[ that's not how sleep works!! vash knows that, which is why he's hissing a: ]

Are not.

[ he could attempt an escape. wolfwood's still got his arms around him, but it's not a tight hold -- vash could wriggle back enough to keep wolfwood from doing that with his thigh. there's only two problems: 1) it'd mean no cuddling, and 2) wolfwood would stop doing that with his thigh.

vash sighs out another low sound at that next press, unable to stop himself from rocking down greedily against it. ]

Sure I am.

[ God, that sound. He'd do anything if it meant getting to keep hearing that sound for the rest of his life. And the way Vash rocks against him - it's perfect. How'd it take them so long to get here? Pair of idiots, that's what they are. He puts a little extra in the next roll, shifts so Vash can feel that he's getting hard. ]

I'm having a great dream. Real sexy one.

Fine.

[ two people can play this game! especially now that he can feel wolfwood getting hard against him again, which is an encouragement all on its own. so the next time he rocks up against wolfwood's thigh, he does it with a little emphasis, and does absolutely nothing to bite back the way it makes him moan. ]

Then you don't care if I just use you, right? I can let you sleep, and -- nnh...

Fuck.

[ That... should not be hot. Wolfwood's been used plenty, and it's never been good. Of course, it comes back to the fact that it's Vash, like it always does. The idea of the most stupid, selfless man he's ever met being selfish for once, using him as the vessel for it... he tries to clamp down on his moan when it happens, and just misses. ]

[ ehehe. it's nice to score a point! ]

Too bad you're not awake. [ nibbling along wolfwood's jaw, the scruff there tickling his skin. that aching pressure between his legs is building up into something insistent, but it feels kinda like cheating to reach down and touch himself now. so he grinds himself a little harder against wolfwood's thigh, voice breaking around a little whine when it's not quite enough. ] We could feel good together.

[ That does sound good... and then Vash whines and the sound goes right to his cock, making it twitch in recognition of a situation it can help with, and he cracks one eye open. ]

That was loud. I think it woke me up.

Yeah? [ anyone else would probably just seize the chance to give wolfwood a hard time in return. vash just brightens up like a puppy at the prospect of walkies. ] G'morning!

[ which is the only warning wolfwood gets before vash is pressing in for a greedy kiss, reaching up to tangle the fingers of his prosthetic in wolfwood's hair. humming a pleased sound at the taste of him as their tongues slide together, trying to hitch himself impossibly closer. ]

[ He's just starting to smile softly at Vash when it's interrupted by a very enthusiastic kiss. Not that he's complaining! He'll have time to pontificate on what it means that Vash is apparently comfortable enough to unleash his goofy side in full force later - for now, kissing takes priority. Vash has a hand in his hair, tongue in his mouth and his hips pressed up close, and it's heaven. Wolfwood lets his hands wander, skating softly down over Vash's back, rests one on the curve of an asscheek and squeezes gently. ]

Good morning yourself. [ Might as well play along. It's cute! ] Wonder how we could make it even better?

[ wolfwood slides a hand down his back, and vash arches up lazily into it like a cat. eyes heavy-lidded, so obviously pleased to be touched anywhere that he isn't even trying to hurry things along. wolfwood's hands don't flinch away from the scars, don't try to steer away from the bits of metal bolted haphazardly down into bone.

it makes vash want to cry. it also makes him want to beg wolfwood for more, to keep touching him, to slide his hands over every inch of skin and offer up absolution.

instead! he latches right onto what wolfwood says with a gleeful sort of eagerness. ] I could blow you again?

[ the magazine didn't happen to mention the art of being coy. ]

[ It's unfortunate that they're so close, because when Wolfwood cracks into bright, loud laughter at that he does absolutely nothing to stifle it. When it finally dies down he's still just beaming at Vash, eyes bright with affection, and his hands resume that stroking after clutching at him so tight one might have thought he was worried he was going to laugh himself right off the bed. ]

You sure know how to make a guy feel wanted.

[ That enthusiasm was off the charts! And it's tempting to say yes just because of that, but there's so much more they could do. Especially with... The Situation. ]

I'll take a rain check. You're too good at it. I don't wanna get spoiled. I could blow you. Or... [ hm. he's been thinking about it pretty much since he saw those petals opening, but there's at least a tiny bit of post-nut clarity that raises an important question. But how the fuck does he ask it? ] How does... is your... [ this is hard ] does the fact that you have a pussy mean you can get pregnant?

[ ... Wolfwood, that was awful. ]

[ plenty of people might take offense to having someone laugh directly in their face right after an offer like that. but vash likes hearing wolfwood laugh, and he's never really minded being the butt of the joke -- which is why he's smiling crookedly, a little puzzled, but pushing himself a little closer like that laughter is something he can soak up through his skin.

wolfwood should laugh like this more often. he looks different when he does it, and even though he figures he likes wolfwood just about any way, there's something about this version that makes vash want start blurting out a bunch of stupid promises.

but. that? makes him blink. and his kneejerk response is a startled laugh: ] What? Haha, no way, that's not how it --

[ and then there's a profound moment of silence, in which the sound of gears turning in vash's head is almost audible. he opens his mouth. closes it. squints a little, the space between his brows knitting. ] ... I don't think so.

[ cocking his head to one side, feeling out the possibility. ] I think I'd know?

You don't think so?

[ It's the kind of question that should be incredulous. A how can you not know, that's pretty important sort of question. Instead, it's contemplative. Being together like this is so good it makes "probably not" seem like really good odds, so they could -

no! So much for the clarity. Aside from all the complications it'd cause for Vash, there are at least three people who'd murder him if he got Vash knocked up and only one who'd have the decency to make it quick. ]

I used to think guys who carried condoms everywhere were overestimating their chances. Guess I owe some people an apology now. But... I know I can't get pregnant.

[ He waggles an eyebrow, suggestive. ]

[ hang on! normally, he'd leap on the offer that those stupid wiggling eyebrows are suggesting, but. it... seems stupid, in retrospect, that he's never even thought about this before. but maybe that's the inherent danger in spending your life trying to run away from what you are just as fast as your legs can take you, huh?

would he know? ... maybe. and if he could, what would that mean? more plants for a planet that's starving for them? or more... things like he and nai, able to grow up into their own ideas of who does and doesn't deserve to live and with enough power to make it so?

would nai know? and the better question: would he tell vash if he did?

... vash doesn't know.

and that's enough to make something shutter in his expression, eyes caught staring somewhere at least a thousand miles away. ]

[ He's not so horny he misses it. The way something in Vash just shuts down, all the joy in him gone. They're still pressed close, but if feels like someone's snapped a curtain shut between them.

Well, fuck them. It's only a curtain. He'll fucking rip it down, if it means he gets to see Vash smiling his rare, real smile again. ]

Hey. [ Lifting a hand, combing gentle fingers through Vash's hair. ] What do you need? What can I do?

[ wolfwood cards a gentle hand into his hair, and it's enough to snap vash back to the present. he jolts, still so unused to being touched that it's enough to shock his system. he blinks, almost like someone waking up after a cat nap, momentary disorientation flickering across his expression --

and then he smiles! a little too bright, voice chipper. ]

Sorry! No, I'm sure it's okay. [ and then, with a careless flick of his wrist, like he can sum the entirety of his being up in the gesture: ] Besides, haha, I don't think this looks like a place where anything can grow.

[ scarred halfway to the point of ruin, so skinny that it looks like the jut of his bones threatens to break right through the skin. and yet, saying it feels like swallowing a needle that catches somewhere behind his ribs -- stupid, like being able to make a new life would count as proof that vash isn't exactly what he knows he is. ]

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