fourstrings | When the world is too dark

When the world is too dark

[ The Evergreen has a strong no-assholes policy. This is undermined somewhat by the fact that Nick basically runs it now, but it means he can use himself as a gauge. If anyone’s a bigger asshole than he is, they get kicked out.

Steve is the kind of asshole who should have been kicked out way earlier. That’s on Nick. He was over-cautious, cut the guy too much of a break, because running this bar is the only thing that has him making enough cash to keep up with his responsibilities. He’d worried that word would get around that The Evergreen wasn’t a friendly place anymore, and he’d ruin the reputation Al had carefully built up for it over the years, drive customers away. And it’s not just because Al’s basically promised him the place and it’s his future he’s gambling on, but respect for Al. He built Nick sure as he built up this bar, and the very least Nick can do in return is not tank it. And in fairness, Steve had started slow: the kind of coarse jokes that are mean instead of funny, taking sly digs at people. Way too much flirting with women beyond the point it became clear that they didn’t want to be flirted with, at least not by Steve. Nick finally found his balls the night he’d rounded the corner to check there was enough paper in the johns and seen Steve caging a girl in against the wall, face leaning in even though hers was twisted adamantly away. He’d grabbed the man by collar and belt with no regard for the fact that Steve had a good three inches and 20 pounds on him, marched him out the door, and told him not to come back, ever.

Which means that Steve is now going on the Wall of Shame, and he’d been such a dick about it Nick wants to make it a special occasion. There’s a little florist across the street that’s probably gonna close down any day now, judging by the amount of foot traffic they get, so before opening the next day Nick heads over to give them a little last bit of support. There’s a little bell that rings cutely as he pushes the door open, a blast of welcome cool, fragrant air, and… the most beautiful man he’s ever laid eyes on behind the counter. Blond hair in one of those trendy cuts that look goofy on most people that aren’t pop stars but somehow suits him just right, big eyes shaded with long lashes, a sweet little beauty mark.

Nick stops dead just inside the door, confident that if he takes one more step without preparation he’s gonna trip over his own feet. ]

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[ okay, that's... almost funny. wolfwood warning him about his little brother, when nai makes intense look like an understatement. but vash only gives a little ehehe of acknowledgement, walking backwards and tugging wolfwood with him until his knees hit the back of the bed. then he lets himself sit, pleased once he's got wolfwood straddling his lap. ]

No sweat. Intense doesn't scare me!

[ but... he leans up a little, pressing a kiss to the corner of wolfwood's mouth. and then, softly, affectionately: ] If you wanna ask me something, you can.

[ he's noticed! the way that wolfwood takes whatever information vash gives him and files it away almost without comment, rarely pressing for more. and he appreciates it, so much that it makes his chest ache a little. ]

[ His eyes get big for a second, because the main thing he's trying to prepare Vash for is the likelihood that the second Nick has to take a piss and leaves him alone with Livio he's gonna end up with Livio proposing to him on Nick's behalf. So if you wanna ask me something takes a beat in which he reminds himself other people can't read his thoughts, and then he smiles softly. ]

You figured me out, huh. Thought I was being slick over here. Acting like I was a cool guy instead of just worried I'd scare you off.

Don't answer if you don't want to. But - Rem.

[ There are tons of photos of Vash and Nai, but based on their ages there's a gap. And the photos after the gap lack two things - one of Vash's arms, and Rem, so...

There isn't a delicate way to ask that doesn't sound schmaltzy, but maybe the softer tone of his voice will take the harsh edge out of the way he phrases it. ]

Looks like she was crazy about you two. Did you lose her in the wreck?

Nah, that's not why. [ leaning up with a smile, rubbing their noses together affectionately. ] You're a nice guy, and you said you spend a lot of time around orphans, right? You didn't want to ask me anything that'd hurt.

[ vash knows it's true, all the way down into his bones.

it does hurt to talk about rem, but just a little, and not all pain is bad. sometimes things hurt just because you loved someone so much, and trying to run away from that is like trying to push them out of your heart. (it's nai that never learned to talk about her, who sat silent and vacant in every therapy session they'd been pushed into, who'd snap with anger if vash tried too hard to push the subject, who still won't look at the pictures of her on the wall. nai who'd wait until he thought vash was asleep to splay a hand over vash's ruined skin, shaking himself silently apart like someone who never learned it was okay to cry.) ]

Yeah. [ bittersweet. ] She adopted us when we were babies... I think she knew our mom, but I don't know how. She's the one who got me into plants -- she had a herb garden on her windowsill, and I always thought it was so cool to grow stuff you can eat. She always wanted us to try new stuff, to learn new things, to see how cool the whole world is. [ there had been an outing almost every weekend. museums, farmer's markets, zoos, craft expos. going out hand-in-hand on their own little adventures, rem's voice brimming over with love whenever she'd shown them something new, explained how something worked. ] I wish you could've met her. She always knew right away when someone was kind.

[ a little breath. inhale, exhale. ] The accident happened when we were ten. It's... I don't remember much of it, but the doctors used to say that happened a lot. We were driving home from... somewhere, I dunno, but another car ran a red light and hit ours. [ if he tries, vash has a faint, blurry memory. headlights flooding the interior, the screech of brakes, the look on nai's face in that split second before impact. he doesn't try very often. ] I was in the hospital for almost a year after that, but it's kind of a blur, too. Rem was already gone by the time help got there.

[ vash had only found out, years later, that the other driver had been drinking. that the case had never gone to trial because the guy was someone important, rich enough to hire the right lawyers, and they'd thrown the whole thing out based on faulty breathalyzer equipment and a possible history of recalls with the vehicle he'd been driving. he and nai had never talked about it, vash never even asked if he'd known. ]

We went to a couple different homes after that. [ might as well get all of it out, if they're already here. ] Some of them were nice, some of them were okay, some of them...

[ a little frown, brows knitting slightly. ] ... I don't think they were... bad people. [ he wants to believe that. it feels too awful to just say that some people are born rotten, that the world always would have been better off without them, like believing it is being disloyal to rem and the love she had for everything. ] They were just... strict. I guess they thought that'd help kids turn out better, maybe?

I did... something, I don't remember. [ another patch of time his brain shuttered protectively, a vague suggestion of events. ] I think I stayed out after curfew, maybe? Or forgot to tell them I was going somewhere.

But they... [ his throat goes tight. ] ... took my arm. Hid it somewhere. Said it was a punishment. [ vash remembers the way he'd reacted well enough. begging them for it back, crying, promising he wouldn't mess up again. pleading not to be sent to school without it, terrified to find that this kind of agency was something someone else could take from him on a whim. ]

I don't really know what Nai did, but he fixed it. He got it back for me, and we ended up leaving pretty soon after. We were sixteen, so... he did something, proved he could take care of both of us on his own, even got us our own place. [ and now he's bright again, the affection shining from inside him like a glow. ] But Nai's always been like that. He can do anything.

Anyway, it's just been us ever since. He got this job when I was in college, and we moved here a couple months after. And once I graduated, he helped me start Seeds!

And now you've got the whole story, I guess.

[ He fucks up. Just for a moment, he feels his jaw clench and his eyes get hot. When you're the person a child has to rely on for everything, when that child has already lost everything once, you never put yourself in a position where you can take from them. You never let them think that you could. But Vash keeps talking, his love for his brother setting a warm light in his eyes, and Nick lets the snake of his anger uncoil and slither away, even if it takes a second of quietly dragging up an old therapist's advice of imagining himself breathing in cool air and breathing out heat. And when Vash wraps up, he ducks in to press a quick little kiss to his mouth. ]

That's some hardcore big brothering. I should ask him for tips. [ He didn't need to ask if Nai was the older one to begin with, but now he's sure. ] And Rem sounds like a gem. I'm glad she got you so into plants you opened up a shop across from the bar.

I know it's pretty Catholic, but... there's a chapel at the orphanage. You wanna go light a candle for her with me when we're out there tomorrow?

Yeah!

[ vash brightens up at that, like a lightbulb just went off. ] I like thinking she's still keeping an eye on me. [ a little nudge, smiling. ] Maybe she's the one who gave you the idea for the wreath.

[ but that makes his expression soften all over again, leaning up to steal another kiss off wolfwood's mouth. ] I'd like that. A lot.

[ reaching up to take wolfwood's face in his hands, just beaming at him. ] You're a really nice guy, y'know? I'm gonna tell you so every day.

[ Ah. He's generally pretty laid-back, but there's one surefire way to make him fluster and Vash just found it. He cuts his eyes away for a second, feeling his cheeks get warm. ]

I-

[ JEEZ. ]

Well, if it means you're talking to me every day, I guess I'll take it.

[ ... cute. cute!!!! vash's smile only gets wider. ]

Every day! [ kissing him right on the mouth. ]

Good morning, Nick, you're a really nice guy. [ another kiss. ] Good night, Nick, you're a really nice guy. [ another kiss, unable to stop himself from laughing. ] You look hot today, and you're a really nice guy.

No, come on-

[ It's making him feel all squirmy. It's not bad! Just... embarrassing. Which is why decisive action is called for - he takes a deep breath, grabs Vash's face in his hands, and kisses him. Firmly, and with a lot of tongue, in the hopes of breaking the flow. ]

[ laughing! even as wolfwood catches his mouth in a kiss, because vash knows a victory when he sees one. but it doesn't take away for it to melt into a low moan, to forget that the kiss is a way of shutting him up because wolfwood's tongue in his mouth makes it hard to think about anything else.

especially because wolfwood didn't bother to put the shirt back on, and when vash drops his hands to the other man's chest --

wow. ]

[ Okay, this plan is even better than he thought. Vash gets distracted pretty quick, and then he's got a hand on Nick's chest and that's great. He hums warm into the kiss, reaching a hand back to rub at the soft buzz of Vash's undercut just to feel it under his fingers.

If Rem really is looking down on Vash, they must make a hell of a picture. Nick in only his jeans, Vash in only a sweater. He hopes she'll have the sense to look away for a while. ]

[ vash hums a pleased little sound at the scritch of wolfwood's fingers over his undercut, the sensation sending shivery tingles down his spine. it feels like a great hardship to finally have to break the kiss just to breathe, but he doesn't let himself go far. keeps his hands sliding lazily down over wolfwood's torso, mapping out the muscle underneath his hands. ]

Are priests even allowed to be hot? I feel like everyone would just be thinking about sinning.

[ That's the kind of compliment he can take in stride. He laughs, arching into Vash's touch - a little to encourage more of it, a little to show off the goods. ]

Nah. I told you I quit, but the truth is they kicked me out. Couldn't keep up with the confessions. I can fill a collection plate like nobody's business, though. Couple of shirtless sermons and the youth group's funded for a year.

[ his appreciation of the view is written all over his face as wolfwood arches up into his touch, cheeks flushing and eyes going a little darker with want. ]

That's one way to get people to stop sleeping in on Sundays.

[ vash has never been religious, but faced with this? he'd never miss a sermon. ]

And here I am, trying to use my god-given skills to get someone into bed. It's a disgrace, I tell ya.

[ He leans in for another kiss, slow and wanting - and this time, he reaches back until he can give Vash's butt (or as much of it as he can get a hand on, sitting like this) a cheeky little squeeze. ]

[ vash doesn't know a ton about what god gets up to, but he feels like there's a case to be made here. surely, if god was opposed to wolfwood using his powers like this, he'd... make him uglier? strike him down with really bad acne, maybe.

the kiss makes his head spin, sends a little shiver down his spine, but he has to break it with a little laugh when wolfwood cops a feel. trying to make up for it by kissing along the line of wolfwood's jaw, liking the way his stubble tickles -- and, because turnabout is fair play, he's also getting a hand on wolfwood's ass so he can squeeze it. ]

[ There's that little return squeeze, and then Nick's laughing too. Loving it - how easy it is already, the comfort of joking around together without worrying that it's gonna ruin the mood. Vash is hot and funny and kind, and as much as it sucks that he has a pretty tragic background there's comfort in knowing Vash isn't going to view him as a pet project or someone who needs pity because he grew up in an orphanage. It's good, a sweet thing, worth hanging onto. He's sure of it already. ]

You're really somethin' special, you know that?

[ grinning up at him, wanting to seal the sound of that laugh away in his memory. ]

Would've sounded better if you said it before you copped a feel. [ teasing, obviously. the words curl themselves up warmly around vash's heart. ] Now I know you've got ulterior motives.

[ but! he wriggles so he can scoot himself backwards without jostling wolfwood off his perch, then flopping back onto the mattress and dragging wolfwood down for another kiss. humming at the feeling of the other man's weight pressing him into the mattress. ]

I'll remember for next time.

[ But that kiss is good, and he savors it, slow and appreciative. Only breaks it to start kissing over Vash's neck again, since he seems to like that - a gentle scrape of teeth, a swipe of his tongue as he lets one hand slide up that sweater again just to stroke over Vash's skin. Actually, hell with the sweater - it's a nice one, real soft, but he starts to slowly peel it up off Vash again just to feel him. ]

[ vash moans a low sound as wolfwood starts kissing a line down his throat, tipping his head back to give him better access. funny that he was so nervous about ditching the sweater just a little while ago -- now that they've gotten the initial reveal out of the way, he's all too happy to help wolfwood tug it the rest of the way off. just the feeling of their chests pressed together is enough to make him sigh a little sound, hands skating reverently down wolfwood's back. ]

[ There we go. Vash lets the sweater go easy, and now Nick has so much more of that warm skin to run his hands over. He does, pausing to give one nipple a little rub and tweak, loving the feel of it pebbling up under his touch. ]

I'm starting to think I'm gonna have to buy flowers for the guy I kicked out. If he hadn't been such an asshole, I wouldn't be here right now.

[ a little gasp as wolfwood's fingers find a nipple, arching up into him greedily. ]

You've got a lot of choices for -- ah -- gratitude. Could probably make a whole bouquet.

I know you'd make the perfect one. Seems like a hassle to give you money to make a bouquet to express my gratitude for me when I could just express it right here, though.

[ Mouthing against Vash's neck again, and his hand tracks down, down, down, over the curve of Vash's waist and the rise of his hip, until he can bring it neatly around and brush his fingers between Vash's legs. ]

[ the little ahaha is a breathless thing. ]

I've got a business to think -- aah..

[ so much for the business. because once wolfwood's fingers are stroking over him there, vash isn't thinking of anything else. his hips jerk up a little, almost automatically, drawn helplessly to that touch. ]

God. I love the way you sound.

[ He backs the claim up by stroking with a little more intent, fingertips firmer over where Vash is still beautifully wet, silken under his touch. Leans to steal the next kiss right off Vash's mouth, teeth tugging gently at his lip. ]

I've got another one of those fancy business plans. I start going in to work earlier every day, and you come over so I can eat you out in your lunch break.

[ vash whines a little sound against wolfwood's mouth as those fingers tease at him, heat fluttering at the pit of his belly at just the thought. it's crazy that a guy this hot wants him so much; vash keeps having to swat aside the urge to reach down and pinch himself, just to see. ]

Is that -- [ his voice catches shyly, but vash doesn't let that stop him for long. leaning up so he can nuzzle up against wolfwood's cheek, almost coy. ] ... all you wanna do?

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